Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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