thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
