Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i think i have two assholes
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
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