can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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