Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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