It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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