dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
