u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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