i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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