Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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