Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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