They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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