I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
NoShamevember. You game?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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