I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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