we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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