I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
