Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
