"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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