Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
