I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize