I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
