this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
