Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize
