we're making bets on your personal life
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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