like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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