So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
