he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
