I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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