that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
