It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
