I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Boobs speak an international language.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize