hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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