Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
where are my eyebrows?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
