he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize