i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
No subtext here. People are naked.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
