Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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