? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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