If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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