I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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