Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
