We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
so let's talk penis.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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