saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
