I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
