Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
