dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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