I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
