I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
