Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
