So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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