Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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